Guiding Light
by Sparkling Draco
Summary: Lissa and Rose have graduated St. Vladimir's Academy and have been invited to spend Summer Holiday's at Tasha Ozera's home. Dimitri left to be Tasha's Guardian and have a chance at fathering a child. What will happen when he and Rose meet again? R&R!
1. It's Your Life, I'm Just Living In It

_Chapter One : It's Your Life, I'm Just Living In It._

It's up to you what you can do.

You're left with all your choices

You're in the clear, another cheer.

Would quiet all the voices.

But it's your life.

And I certainly wouldn't.

Tell you what to do.

It's your life.

And I realise you're.

Living out your dreams.

I know just what you think.

You're on the brink of being someone.

Close to the top, but will you flop?

'Cause you forgot where you came from.

If I would've known what I know today.

I guess I wouldn't have it any other way.

If I would've known what I know today.

I guess I wouldn't have it any other way.

But it's your life.

And I certainly wouldn't.

Tell you what to do.

It's your life.

And I realise you're.

Living out your dream.

-.- -.- -.- -.- -.- -.-

Lissa, Christian, Eddie and I had been living in the Royal Court for almost a full year now. Usually, Royal Moroi – which Christian and Lissa were, had 2 Guardians each but because Lissa and Christian had been invited to stay at the Royal Court under the watchful eye of Queen Tatiana, there was only need for one each from the Academy and one more each from the Court. 2 years ago, almost 3 now, Queen Tatiana had proposed to Lissa that she should come live in the Royal Court to learn the ways of Politics and all that other boring Royal stuff, as well as going to a nearby Moroi College, Lehigh.

Lissa had only agreed to live at the Court when had Tatiana relented to letting Christian come as well, although I knew her real plans were to try and play Match Maker with Adrian and Lissa claiming that _Vasilisa's grown into a very promising young woman. She has a very serious, very dedicated nature that will cure some of Adrian's recklessness. And being together will allow them to continue examining their unusual magical situation._ All of that blew into the wind when Christian and Lissa's relationship only strengthened and my relationship with Adrian started, much to Queen Tatiana's dismay. On a number of occasions, Tatiana had shown her dislike of me and my non-existent – at the time – affair with Adrian, telling me that _Adrian Ivashkov is not going to run off with some cheap dhampir girl, so you might as well rid yourself of that delusion right now. If it was up to me, I'd pack you up and send you off to some blood whore commune. You'd probably fit in well. _The only reason why I wasn't palmed off onto some other Moroi was because of the Shadow-Kissed bond that I share with Lissa.

_Rose!_ Lissa used our bond to yell into my head, I quickly pulled out of Adrian's hold on me and noted that the feelings coming through the bond were excitement not fear or terror. I slowed my pace and pulled Adrian along with me, my relationship with him wasn't the same as what I'd always thought my mature ones would be, I wasn't with him because I loved him, although I did – in a way, it was for the companionship. It wasn't like what I had with Dimitri – who'd left St. Vladimirs Academy to protect Tasha Ozera, Christian's Aunt, and for a chance to father children – something I could never do, with him it was all passion and unadulterated love.

"What's wrong?" I asked, automatically scanning the room for any danger, I sat on the couch when I couldn't find any. Adrian sat down next to me, wrapping his arms around me and pulling my legs over his lap. Ever since we'd started dating, he'd always made sure he was touching me in some way.

"Nothing's wrong" She said, somewhat startled. "Tasha Ozera has invited us to stay with her for the Summer Holidays." I froze but quickly recovered myself and tried to smile.

"That's... That's great," I gave her a tight smile and tried to distract myself by tracing the natural lines on Adrian's hand, his other hand ran the length of my leg – always seducing, always caring. It was _so_ Adrian.

"We leave tomorrow, is that enough time for you to pack?"

"Um... Well..." I looked to Adrian and Eddie for help, even though neither of them new about my love for Dimitri, I just hoped they'd see my urgency and wouldn't question it too much.

Seeing my expression, Eddie spoke up, though not in my favor "You have to go Rose, Lissa's your Moroi, wherever she goes, you go."

I sighed but nodded, _They come first, _the words that had been drilled into me from my first day of Guardian training rang in my head. "It should be plenty of time"

"Yay!" Lissa chimed in her always cheerful attitude.

"Are you coming?" I asked Adrian, hoping he would say yes – but also wishing he wouldn't. I wanted him there for moral support and for confidence but I wasn't ready to have the Dimitri conversation with him yet, hell not even Lissa knew about it.

"I would, little dhampir, but I am needed here for Tatiana." I grumbled as I got up from the couch and made my way to my room. Lissa and I shared a 2 bedroom suite, but because Queen Tatiana wouldn't allow her and Christian to live together, they had nightly sleep overs and I've spent most of my nights in Adrian's suite, which was conveniently located only 2 doors away from Lissa – it was where we were when she had yelled for me.

I walked into my bedroom and quickly turned on Adrian, I faintly heard Lissa call about no distractions but I wasn't listening. "If you can't come, will you dream walk to me?"

"Of course, Rose, why are you so anxious about meeting Tasha? You've met her before." He put his hands to my face before he kissed my forehead.

"I'm not anxious... I just don't want to be away from you for that long" I whispered, it was mostly true, although I wasn't in love with Adrian the same way that I was with Dimitri, I still had serious feelings for the guy and being away from him for weeks on end made me sad.

"Little Dhampir' Adrian murmured, I brought him to my lips and gave him a long kiss which he instantly returned. After a few minutes I pulled away.

"I need to pack"

"Okay" he said giving me a quick peck that turned into another kiss, and another... and another. _Ahem _I heard sound in my mind, _I don't hear packing. _I pushed Adrian away from me this time and moved over to my closet to find my suitcase. He lounged across my bed and watched me pack stuff for every occasion into my bag.

It took me nearly an hour to have everything packed, by the time I was finished it was almost time for dinner. I followed Christian, Lissa and Adrian with Eddie to the feeders for them to get their daily fill.

"Ah Rose, I trust you and Adrian are doing well?" Queen Tatiana murmured, everyone in the room stopped what they were doing and swept into low bows – including myself.

"Yes, Your Majesty, very well." I murmured back to her, she grumbled and walked off to a feeder that was free. I was surprised to see her in the feeding quarters, Tatiana had her own blood source, he was dhampir and also her secret lover, Ambrose was his name, no one knew any of this, it was a secret that Lissa had told me. I had met Ambrose before and if I was being completely honest, he was one of the hottest dhampir's I had ever seen – with the exception of Dimitri.

"What was that about?" asked Adrian as he came up and hugged me, I quickly pushed him away. Tatiana was still in the room and if I wanted to be taken seriously around here, I had to act professionally. I quickly explained this to him when I saw his reaction.

As soon as we were out of the feeding area and on our way to the cafeteria, Adrian stopped me. I was about to question him when his lips made contact with mine, I started kissing him back for a few seconds before I could taste the blood, quickly I pushed him away from me – wiping my mouth on my sleeve.

"Yuck! I can still taste the blood" Even though I was half vampire, blood didn't appeal to me like it did to Moroi, the human side of me overtook that and I only fed on food rather than other people.

"Oh, sorry, I'll go brush my teeth and meet back up with you." I watched Adrian leave, happy that he wasn't surrounded by his usual cloud of smoke, I had convinced him to give that up – although I couldn't get him to stop drinking so much, but I was happier that he had at least cut back some of his bad habits.

I had just sat down to my chicken burger when I felt someone behind me, defensively I spun around, ready to pin them to the ground, but it was only Adrian.

After we sat back down, he kissed me again, I let my eyes close and responded naturally to it, tasting spearmint rather than blood – for that, I was very grateful. "Better?" He asked.

"Much" I mumbled, connecting our lips again, deepening the kiss this time.

"Excuse me? Some people are trying to enjoy their meals" I heard Lissa's voice say, mocking disgust though through the bond I could feel her amusement and genuine happiness for my happiness.

"You've already eaten" I mumbled, picking what I didn't like from my burger.

"No, I've already _drank_. I'm still hungry though." she clarified, I shrugged and mumbled _whatever._

It only took us half an hour to eat and then we were back to our suites.

"Stop pacing, little dhampir, and come to bed" I stopped in my pacing to shoot a soft glare at Adrian, I was getting nervous, it was less than 8 hours before I would be leaving to go stay at Tasha Ozera's home for a full month. Dimitri would be there, and Adrian wouldn't.

I stopped walking suddenly and climbed onto the bed, Adrian gave me a triumph smirk and leaned forward to kiss me, at the last minute I pulled back – an urgent look on my face.

"Are you sure you can't come to Tasha's house?" I ran my hand through his stylish mess of hair and looked deeply into his green eyes – which were by far his best feature.

"I'm sorry, hun, I can't." I frowned at him but otherwise let it drop, even if Adrian couldn't be there, at least Lissa would be.

I laid down further in the bed and hugged myself against his chest, it wasn't the same as when I had hugged Dimitri, his chest was so broad and muscular whereas Adrian's was well sculpted but leaner. It was comforting and a kind of sanctuary.

"Good night" I mumbled, falling into a sleepy haze.

"Good night Rose" he whispered, kissing the top of my head. I leaned up to kiss his lips once before I laid back against him, falling unconscious almost instantly. _It's okay, tomorrow will be fine, the next month will be tolerate-able, keep your eye on the job at hand. Protect Lissa._


	2. Last Kiss

_Chapter Two : Last Kiss_

I still remember the look on your face.

Been through the darkness at 1:58.

The words that you whispered for just us to know.

You told me you loved me so why did you go away, go away.

I do recall now the smell of the rain.

Fresh on the pavement, I ran off the plane.

That July 9th the beat of your heart.

It jumps through your shirt, I can still feel your arms.

Never thought we'd have a last kiss.

Never imagined we'd end like this.

Your name, forever the name on my lips.

Because I loved your handshake, meeting my mother.

I love how you walked with your hands in your pockets.

How you'd kiss me when no one was looking.

There's not a day I don't miss those stolen kisses.

-.- -.- -.- -.- -.- -.-

"Christian! Lissa!" I got out of the car and saw Tasha Ozera run into the open arms of Christian, she gave Lissa a kiss on the cheek and greeted Eddie and I warmly before ushering us all inside.

Just then someone closed the gates behind us with a loud shudder, I spun around – instantly on alert but stopped short, it was Dimitri. He looked the exact same as when he had been my mentor at St. Vladimir's almost a year and a half ago, if it was possible he was even more handsome now, I wasn't sure. He still had his brown hair sleeked back into a ponytail and wore his black slacks and black T-shirt.

Dimitri stopped momentarily, a smile breaking out on his face before he turned back to his guardian mask and greeted me warmly – it broke me out of the trance I seemed to be in.

"Rose" he spoke softly, almost as if he was happy I was here, but that couldn't be true. He'd left me for Tasha, not in the way you'd think, I guess, but nevertheless, he'd still done it. He'd left me, the one he claimed to love for Tasha Ozera because she offered him children – that's a pretty unique offer I guess, Dhampir's were rapidly becoming less and less populated and if a Moroi was offering to make more Dhampir's then by all means, take it. But why did it have to be Dimitri? My Dimitri? The man I loved so much. Well, okay, he wasn't _my _Dimitri, Adrian was mine – but Dimitri _was_ mine in ways that Adrian would never be. For instance, Dimitri had been my first love, not my first kiss but my first _real _kiss.

"Dimitri" I nodded curtly, glad for the distraction when I saw Eddie struggling with everyone's luggage, I rushed over to help him.

Tasha's house was lovely, it looked like one of those olden time homes, it was a 3 storey brick home that had a white port that went over 2 levels of the house with large white pillars.

"Dimka, could you please show everyone to their rooms while I go make refreshments?" Dimitri nodded and lead us up the first flight of stairs.

"Lissa, Christian," he stopped in front of the second door on the wide landing and opened the door, "This is your room". The bedroom was cute, it had it's own bathroom and was big and mostly white except for the king sized bed – which was ruby red.

Dimitri then moved to another door a few metres down on the same side once we had left Lissa and Christian's room, I prayed the whole time we hesitated outside it that the room was mine, I didn't want to have to spend any alone time with Dimitri – even if it was for a few seconds.

Much to my dismay, the room turned out to be Eddie's. I didn't see much of it before I was lead away, but what I did see was that the walls were a dark shade of green and the bed spread was white.

"This is your room, Rose," Dimitri murmured as he opened the door to a room that was in the middle of Lissa and Christian's, and Eddie's but on the other side of the hallway. I stepped inside and saw that the walls were a light shade of blue and my king sized bed was a dark grey colour with white pillows. There was a closed door off to my left and a removable closet in the corner of the room. A flat screen television sat on a dresser against the wall opposite the bed.

I turned back around, half expecting that Dimitri had left quickly like when he was showing the other rooms, but he was still standing there leaning against the door frame with his hands in his pockets. I walked over to the desk in front of the big window and set my suitcase down, opening it up. I wanted to get changed into something more comfortable, rather than my Guardian clothes.

"Roza..." Dimitri was right behind me when he spoke, I jumped a little – not expecting his close proximity, but otherwise kept looking through my clothes.

"I was kind of expecting to see little dhampir's running around." I slipped out, I panicked for a second before I remembered that I had a reason to be hurt and angry.

"No... Um..." I turned around to face him, Dimitri was never at a loss for words. "Tasha can't have children, we found out about a month after I became her Guardian."

"And you still stayed with her?" I asked, looking up at him, my clothes all but forgotten.

He shrugged, "She still needed a Guardian"

"But what..." I trailed off, "Nevermind" I muttered and turned back around to start looking for clothes again. _Adrian, Adrian, think about Adrian._

"You were about to ask why I didn't come back for you." Dimitri stated, not as a question. He still knew how my mind worked even after over a year of not seeing me.

"It doesn't matter, that's irrelevant now"

"I didn't come back because I didn't want Tasha to think I was just using her to populate our kind. I'd made a promise that I would protect her, and as much as I wanted to return to St. Vladimir's, they come first." Dimitri explained, I sighed and stopped rummaging through my bag, staring out the window.

"You can leave now, I need to get changed" I heard the door softly close a moment later, I looked behind me to check that he was gone and when I was sure that he was, I took out the first things I saw. I threw on a purple mid sleeved top that showed off my curves a little and a pair of denim jeans, I kept a pair of enclosed shoes on just in case I needed to do some scouting and made my way out of the room. Just as I was closing the door, Eddie opened his, I was glad to see that he had changed into more casual clothes as well – wearing just a red muscle shirt and a pair of black denim jeans with runners on. I gave him a small smile and walked down the hallway.

I followed the sound of heels against tiles and found the kitchen, it was a simple one but spacious, it had marble bench tops and an island in the middle. I saw Tasha walking around, putting out snacks and filling drinks.

"Hi" I murmured when I entered the room, she turned around briefly before setting the plates on the bench top and came over to give me a tight hug. I still wasn't fond of Tasha but she was so nice to me – even if it was fake, I wasn't sure, that I was finding it harder to stay mad at her for taking Dimitri away from me. After all, she didn't know about my feelings for him – or his for me.

"Hello Rose" I knew she didn't like me as much as she liked Lissa, but then again – Lissa was a very loveable person. "Would you like a drink?" she asked, handing me one that looked like Lemonade. I took it gladly, thanking her.

"What are we doing today Aunt Tash?" Christian asked, coming up beside her and hugging her with one arm. I quickly checked the clock while I waited for Tasha to reply to him, it was 2:46pm.

"Well, I figured that Rose and Eddie would want to get to know the house and surroundings, so we'll just hang around and go out for dinner later."

"Dimka!" Tasha called, a moment later Dimitri appeared. She walked up to him and gave him a hug, I had to look away reminding myself that I had Adrian waiting for me at home. Adrian, my amazing Moroi boyfriend, _he loves you Rose, don't mess it up. _"Could you show Eddie and Rose around the surroundings of the house? You know it better than I do." Tasha's words broke me away from my thoughts.

"Of course" he said politely in his Russian accent, he looked over Tasha's head and smiled at me – his easy cute grin, I could feel my heart hammering away.

I was smiling when I turned to put my cup on the bench, but it quickly faded when I saw the look on Lissa's face, the expression she always got when she thought she was on to something – and she usually was. I cleared my throat quietly and put on my Guardian facade.

An hour later, I found myself following Dimitri around the bushes of Tasha's home.

"The protective charms start here and go around the whole place – just like at St. Vladimir's Academy." My eyebrows furrowed.

"This place has protective charms? But I thought that was only for..." I trailed off, deep in thought.

"That these charms were only for populated places like the Academy and Royal places? Well, even though Tasha's family's been shunned, they're still Royal." I nodded my head, understanding Dimitri's words.

Eddie, Dimitri and I made our way back to the house, the moment we got inside, Eddie sped off to the Kitchen.

"Rose, can we talk for a minute?" Dimitri had asked, I quickly shook my head – tuning into where Lissa was, she was in her guest room with Christian.

"Sorry, Comrade." I heard him sigh softly and walk past me, moving down the hall – probably in search for Tasha. As he passed by me, his arm brushed by mine – I shivered lightly, feeling the pull I used to get towards him but took a few calming breaths and walked up the stairs to Lissa's room.

I quietly knocked on her closed door... then knocked louder... then again...

"Go away!" I heard Christian yell from inside, I was just about to argue with him that I wanted to see Lissa until I heard a giggle.

_Oh... Yuck _I shuddered involuntarily and went to my own room, I closed my door and looked around to see what I could do. I flipped on the television and roamed through the channels, I settled on a daytime show called _The Young and The Restless_.

When I couldn't take any more of the bad acting I turned the T.V off and laid down on my bed, not knowing what to do. I didn't bring any books with me – frankly I didn't read them much, that was always Lissa's hobby. I sighed frustratedly into my pillow and let my mind wander, thinking of Adrian, of Dimitri, of Mason, every relationship that I had ever let down. I wasn't sure when it'd happened, but eventually my thoughts turned into a dream.

_They stood in a circle around me, Dimitri. Adrian. Mason. Even Jesse Zeklos was there, the boy who I had had a brief flirtation with. I was standing in the middle of their circle, they all had their arms reached out for me, hurt expressions on their faces – trying to make me decide between them all._

_Finally they started to fade, showing my choices. Jesse vanished rather quickly, then Mason faded – slower than Jesse, he'd been such a good friend to me – and in our small relationship, he'd been so caring, it was also somewhat my fault for his untimely death._

_Both Adrian and Dimitri stayed in front of me, they'd fade a little bit – both a different times and then be completely visible, waiting expectantly for me to leap into their arms. I wasn't sure which was harder to see hurting, I loved them both._

_The scene changed abruptly then, so suddenly that I stumbled back a few paces._

"_Little Dhampir!" Adrian's voice sounded, I spun around and saw him sitting in one of the many rows of benches. I recognised the place we were in as St. Vladimir's Chapel. A place I had always gone whenever I needed peace and clarity._

"_Adrian!" I said in relief, my quiet voice still seemed like it was too loud for this place, I quickly went over to him and pulled him to me, hugging him tightly._

"_Rose, we've only been apart for a few hours" he laughed, I hugged him tighter not willing to let him go yet._

"_Still too long" I mumbled, then something occurred to me, "Hey why are you asleep?"_

"_Just taking a nap, thought I'd try my luck and see if you were sleeping as well. Court's boring without you." he explained, "...Why are you sleeping?"_

"_I was bored, there's nothing to do at that place." I frowned, trying to be subtle about it – fearing that Father Andrew would walk past, I put my legs over his. Adrian straightened up and lifted me – surprisingly easy for someone just using their arms, and sat me on his lap. I looked around frantically for the Father but he was nowhere in sight, letting me relax a little._

_I ran my hands through Adrian's messy brown hair, lightly kissing his cheek. I smiled at him – tracing the light stubble line he had to his chin, but then sighed, the smile fading. "Come to Tasha's" I murmured._

"_I can't, not yet." I frowned._

"_What's Tatiana got you doing, anyway?"_

"_Just the usual, meeting Royal's, Moroi, nothing interesting. I would much rather be with you" he told me, pushing my hair back behind my ear, he stroked my cheek with his thumb before giving me a gentle kiss on the lips, his kiss grew more urgent the more I responded to it – with much trouble, I managed to break apart from him._

"_We're in a Chapel, Adrian." I murmured, trying to sound disapproving but it just came out disappointed._

"_Fair enough" I was surprised, thinking that Adrian had agreed to just stop what we were quickly escalating to, but apparently he didn't. I felt him lay back, my hands landed on something soft – I looked around and saw that we were now in Adrian's suite back at the Royal Court. I let out a faint 'oh' but was quickly distracted again by Adrian's lips, as he deepened the kiss again I felt his hands at the hem of my shirt, I was pretty sure we were just about to shred each others clothes when I heard something; my name in particular._

"_Rose..." I froze, _what the hell? Was someone watching us? _"Rose?"_

"_Do you hear that?" I asked Adrian, sitting up. It sounded like it was coming from the window but when I walked over to it, I didn't see anyone._

_Adrian groaned, straightening up and buttoning the ones I had managed to undo. "Someone's interrupting us."_

"_I know that. But where's it coming from? I thought Dream Walking was private?" I told him, slightly accusing. He walked over to me and wrapped me in his arms._

"_They are, someone's trying to wake you up from your sleep" I sighed and told him that I didn't want to leave him yet – to which he agreed. As hard as I tried to hold onto him, I could feel Adrian disappearing, with one last kiss, he faded until I couldn't feel or see him at all._

I woke up to the voice to Dimitri, I groaned and turned over, "What?"

"Who's Adrian?" He asked, not hiding his annoyance, I furrowed my eyebrows. _How'd he know I was dreaming of Adrian?_

"What?" I said again, this time referring to what he'd just asked.

"Adrian. You were whispering in your sleep, you told him that you love him." My eyebrows pulled together again in confusion, I hadn't told Adrian I loved him in my dream, I _had_ been thinking it though.

"Adrian... Adrian Ivashkov, he's my boyfriend." I mumbled, laying my head back on my pillow.

"Your boyfriend? Adrian Ivashkov?" Dimitri mumbled, shocked. I glared at him.

"Is that so hard to believe? Adrian's a wonderful boyfriend!"

"He's a sleaze, Rose!" I sprung up until I was sitting on my bed, glaring as hard as I could. I'd dealt with his before, from basically every one of my friend's, but Dimitri had no right butting into my love life.

"He is not!" I pushed him, trying to get him closer to the door so he would take the hint that I didn't want him near me.

"Adrian Ivashkov is not good enough for you, Roza" He murmured softly, using my name in Russian – I didn't spare a thought for it though, I was seeing red. I got out of my bed and pushed him again, this time kicking my leg out to trip him over, I fell down with him and connected my fist with the side of his face. I got another hit in before Dimitri caught my arm and rolled us over, using his weight to pin me down. I thrashed at him, trying to get him away from me. I admit that I was probably overreacting, but I had so much pent up rage toward him that it kind of burst out of me.

"Get off me, Dimitri!" I growled.

"Not until you calm down" he stated, I gave him a death glare and tried to bring my legs up to hurt him somehow but he sat back, making it impossible.

"Ow" I complained, he eased up but only slightly, still having me pinned under his weight.

"Have you calmed down now?" Dimitri asked after a few minutes of no struggling. I nodded, defeated tears escaping my eyes, he released my arms but otherwise stayed on me – probably not trusting me yet.

"Adrian loves me" I mumbled weakly.

"Everyone loves you, Roza" I sighed and looked up at him, his dark brown eyes sparkled down at me.

"Don't call me Roza, that's what you used to call me when you cared."

"I still care about you," he whispered, then added more pointedly "Rose."

His face seemed to get closer, I couldn't look away from his eyes – weirdly trapping me, I felt more tears pour out of my eyes, warm against my cheeks. It felt strange, I never cry.

I tried to tell him to stop as I saw his face get nearer and nearer, but I felt the urge – the strength of the pull, it was almost like compulsion that made me want to kiss him, which was impossible since dhampir's didn't have that gift.

Dimitri's lips softly landed on mine, caring and gentle – like they'd always been. I kissed him back, my eyes closing of their own accord. It was only a short and sweet kiss but it still made my heart race to an unnatural speed. My breath had accelerated and I tried to force it to return to a normal pace, it was funny what one kiss could do to someone.

_Knock knock, knock knock._

Dimitri shot up, pulling me with him. That's when it hit me, I'd just cheated on Adrian. And he'd just cheated on Tasha. A horrified expression spread over my face as I glared at Dimitri again.

_Knock, knock._

"Rose?" I heard Lissa's voice on the other side of the door. I snapped out of my horror and raced to get the door.

"Hey Liss" I tried sounding casual and thankfully through the bond I felt her indifference, until she saw Dimitri behind me.

"Um, we're leaving for dinner in 30 minutes..." She trailed off, a vacant expression on her face as she walked off. In her mind, I saw her shock at Dimitri being in my room and her suspicion as to why he was there in the first place.

"Leave" I told Dimitri, he hesitated at the threshold and raised his hand to my hair but I moved closer to the door, almost half behind it. I looked at him sadly and motioned for him to leave, not trusting my voice.

"See you soon, Roza"

I closed the door behind him and moved over to my suitcase, not letting myself think too much of what had just happened. But still, throughout looking for nice clothes, I found myself touching my lips a few times. Even if that kiss was completely out of line, it was something that I'd missed terribly, and having it happen now just confirmed how much I love him.

I finally decided on a long black pant satin jumpsuit with a gold sequin strapless top and gold slip on heels – easy to kick off if danger presented itself [on profile]. I put on my _Chotki_ bracelet that I had been given once it became apparent that I would be Lissa's Guardian, and my necklace that my mother had given me a few years ago to _protect_ me, I was never sure of what it was called but it looked like an eye. The two pieces of jewellery never suited each other or what ever I was wearing, but I didn't care, they meant a lot to me – I'd never take them off. I tied my hair into a ponytail with my fringe in a poof on the top of my head, trying to give myself at least some feminine features.

I descended the stairs, looking around for Lissa – I couldn't find her, Tasha stood by the door, looking at her finger nails. She was wearing a Royal blue dress, it went to her knee's and was a holta-neck, the waist of the dress was pleated, I would be completely delusional if I didn't think she looked beautiful – another blow to my limited fashion now-a-days. She had silver strappy heels on with a vine shaped ring on her middle finger that wound around it, her Ozera crest was around her neck, it was a snake wrapping around fire – it was known that all Ozera descendants had specialised in Fire. [on profile]

She greeted me and told me that she thought I looked beautiful, I smiled in thanks and patiently waited for Lissa to finish getting ready. Christian entered a few seconds after I had, decked out in a full suit with a white shirt but no tie. He had his Ozera crest in the shape of a ring – similar to Tasha's necklace but more manly looking [on profile].

"You clean up nice, Christian." I told him, gesturing a hand to his suit.

"Thanks, Rose. You too." he mumbled awkwardly, I smiled and casually said my thanks, _still _waiting for Lissa.

_Almost ready! _Lissa said quickly through the bond, I rolled my eyes at no one in particular and folded my arms across my chest. _Ugh! Rose can you come help me look for my shoes? I can't find them anywhere!_

I sighed and explained to Tasha and Christian that Lissa needed me upstairs and walked the staircase, though half way up I stopped – Dimitri blocking my path. He looked at me, the emotion on his face making butterflies erupt in my stomach, _this isn't right, remember Adrian. _We were in a part of the staircase that swivelled around the corner – so thankfully no one could see us.

"I don't think Tasha would appreciate the way you're looking at me, _Dimka_" I tried to make a joke out of it, but it just turned out sounding rude. I frowned at myself and tried to excuse my behaviour. "That sounded less... mean in my head..." I trailed off.

Dimitri shrugged, "I deserve a few jabs from you" _Damn straight_, I thought.

"More than a few actually" I replied, with a small huff of a laugh, though I was completely serious.

"You're right" He murmured softly, but then more pointedly looked down my body, "You do look beautiful though, Roza"

I blushed a little – which was rare for me, then tried to shift some of the light, "I thought I told you not to call me Roza" maybe that wasn't the best way.

"Sorry, _Rose. _I think you like me calling you... that name, you used to. Is that why you want me to stop? So you won't get confused about _Adrian_?" He sneered Adrian's name.

"There's nothing to be confused about, I love Adrian... not you" I almost faltered with the last part but I kept my head held high and tried to sound nonchalant about it.

"You don't believe that," Dimitri's eyes seemed to grow bright, a smile stretching his face. "I know you, Rose, I can tell when you're lying."

"You do not know me anymore!" I growled, glaring at him – though I couldn't meet his eyes, he still knew me, and somehow it seemed like he knew me better than before. "And I'm not lying." I added as an after thought, trying to push past him but he was still blocking my way.

"Move out of my way, Comrade." finally he did, I walked up the stairs as fast as I could in order to get away from him. As I was reaching the top step I looked back to see him still watching me with a soft smile on his face, a smile that I loved so much. With a quiet _humph _I turned back around – my ponytail swishing with the movement and opened the door to Lissa's room, I could feel her growing annoyance as to why I hadn't gotten to her yet.

"Finally!" She exclaimed dramatically once I had closed the door behind me. "What took you so long?"

"Sorry, I got distracted." I lamely explained, she saw through it but didn't press the matter.

It took us 10 minutes to find her gold heels, eventually when she had put the finishing touches on her outfit – I took a good look at her. She was wearing a satin champagne coloured strapless dress that had the hem of it hitched up in different places, she wore those gold glitter heels that I had just helped her find and her Dragomir crest hung from her neck – her family's symbol was a Lion, her crest had 2 Lion's holding up a Crown, showing their line in Royalty [on profile].

We finally made our way downstairs again, this time all eyes were on Lissa – they'd already seen me, and honestly, I felt worse than plain next to her which I'm sure was exactly how I looked.

I caught sight of Eddie then, he was wearing a lighter shade of black suit with a white shirt and a white tie that had so many small dots on it that it looked almost grey [on profile].

-.- -.- -.- -.-

The restaurant we had gone to tonight was especially for Moroi's and dhampir's, it had it's own guardian's patrolling the building, so there wasn't really anything for Eddie, Dimitri and I to do – but with all that aside, we still stayed on alert, there was always the chance that someone inside could be looking to hurt one of our Moroi's.

When we finally got home – although it was still light, we were all exhausted. I got into my pyjama's and made a last sweep around the house with Eddie before I took a glass of water to my room and settled into the extremely comfortable bed – the moment my head hit the pillow, I was unconscious.

**[Author Note: There are photo's of the characters on my profile, I had to choose them from scratch, so I hope you guys have pictured them this way.]**


	3. Author Note, Please Read

Dear All,

This will be my one and only Author Note I swear,

Some of you have mentioned that I need to do more research on the books, I have only read up to Shadow Kiss and so obviously my knowledge is going to be a little limited.

This is my version of the story though – I'm not trying to copy every single thing that happens in Vampire Academy, which completely belongs to **Richelle Mead**.

One of you said that Dimitri and Adrian get along differently than in **Guiding Light**, I didn't know this but I wanted Dimitri to not like Adrian in my fan fiction, it would cause more drama. I apologise if this happening would cause some of you to no longer want to follow my chapters – I didn't want that to happen, but this is _my _fan fiction and I want to write it the way I want – I'm sure all of you writers out there can understand that.

I'm not too sure what _Iwmskod _meant of that my idea was too over done, did you mean that I thought too much about my story and it didn't come across in the right way?

Posting the first chapter was an impulse decision and I wrote it in about an hour, so i'm sorry if it's rushed – which I don't think it is.

And also, The Dragomir crest – I completely forgot that the symbol was a Dragon, I must have misread that part in the book because I thought it was a Lion, I remembered that in Shadow Kiss Rose explained about the Dragon being King of Beasts or something, and so I automatically thought of the Lion because you know... King of the Jungle and everything.

And in response to changing the way Rose acts around Dimitri, I thought I was doing that part well, because she stays strong with how she won't let her guard down too much. That's how it came across in my mind.

I wanted to show how much Rose loves Dimitri and although she's committed to Adrian – she still has that pull towards him. Correct me if I'm wrong.

But I do want readers and I don't want to stray from the book _too _much, so if someone can message me with some pointers of important things that happened in the later books from **Blood Promise** onwards.

I don't care about spoilers, but please just tell me stuff that would be relevant for my story.

I hope this doesn't come across as too mean :)

xx

P.s The next chapter will come shortly after I get some responses. :)


	4. Moving On

_Chapter Three : Moving On._

When I think about my life

I wonder if I will survive

To live to see 25

Or will I just fall?

Like all my friends

They just keep dying

People around me

Always crying

In this place that I like to

Call my home.

Without the things we've lost

The things we gained

We'll take with us.

Some friends become enemies

Some friends become your family

Make the best with what you're given

This isn't dying.

This isn't living.

-.- -.- -.- -.- -.-

I woke up around sunrise the next morning, I stretched and yawned, grabbing the first clothes that I could find and making my way to the bathroom that joined with my room.  
>I let the hot water wash over my body before I got out and dressed in a pair of black tights, a navy blue – almost black, sleeveless top which had a belt tied around the middle to define my waist. Feminine yet practical. I threw on my grey lace up shoes and tied my hair in a pony tail, making sure that my Chotki and Necklace were still on me <span>[on profile]<span>.  
>"Good morning, Rose." Lissa murmured after I'd knocked on the door, she had a plain white summer dress on with white ballet flats that had black lining and flower patterns on them. As she opened the door, she twisted her Dragomir Dragon crest that was around her neck – today it was silver <span>[on profile]<span>.  
>"Morning," I mumbled as I moved to sit on the couch in her and Christian's room. "Do you know what we're doing today?" I asked Lissa and Christian when he came back from their bathroom. I kept my eyes away from him as he tried to find a shirt to where.<br>"I have no idea, I guess we'll just have to wait until we see Tasha." I nodded my head with what she'd said, and followed them out of the room.  
>"Morning, Aunt Tasha" Christian murmured, moving to the Refrigerator and getting the first thing he could see.<br>"Good morning, guys. The feeders are going to be here in an hour." Tasha told everyone, after a few minutes of silence, she spoke again. "After they've left, I was thinking that because it's overcast did everyone want to go for a Picnic?" Overcast meant that Moroi could be out in the day time without growing too weak from the sunlight, leading an almost normal life, rather than the nocturnal one at the Academy and Court.

The feeders left half an hour after they'd arrived and then an hour after that we were on our way to the local park for a picnic.  
>"Dimka, sit down and have something to eat!" Tasha said, but he wasn't looking at her, he was scanning the forest wall again. I felt a chill go down my spine as I saw Dimitri stiffen a few feet away from me, Immediately I was on my feet.<br>"Stay with them," Dimitri ordered as he stalked off into the line of trees. The feeling in my stomach didn't ease until I saw Dimitri run back out of the bed of trees, his hair dishevelled and panting slightly.  
>"What happened?" Tasha yelled at him, thankfully there weren't many people near us so nobody heard her outburst.<br>"Strigoi, only one though. We need to leave." Dimitri packed up the picnic set in record time and led Tasha by the arm to her car.  
>"A Strigoi? How? It's daytime!" I exclaimed as the car sped off in the direction of Tasha's house.<br>"I should have known. It was so overcast that the forest was in complete darkness, he must have had a nest somewhere close to there." he started muttering again, "I'm so sorry, Tash."  
>"It's not your fault, Dimka." Tasha murmured to him, soothing his hand with hers, I looked away, trying to focus on Adrian. The thought of him calmed me well enough that I was able to look at them and the only emotion that ran through my body was Envy – Envy that Adrian wasn't here to do the same for me.<p>

"Sorry, we're going to have to stay home tonight." Dimitri said once everyone had gotten safely inside, there were no more signs of any Strigoi and it could have been completely coincidence that we came across that one in the park, but we couldn't take any chances. On my third scout of the house, I was joined by Dimitri.  
>"I haven't found anything, Comrade" I told him, thinking he was coming to check on me – I guess i'd always be his student in one way or another.<br>"I didn't think you would, any Strigoi would be long gone – until sunset at least." he explained, I kept walking, keeping my eyes peeled for any sign of a disturbance.  
>It was when Dimitri left that I saw it – or rather, him. He was lounging under a tree, looking casual and as if his sudden appearance was normal.<br>"Adrian?" I gasped, feeling cautious to approach him, how could he be here? He'd told me just yesterday that Tatiana had him doing too much to be able to visit me.  
>"Little Dhampir!" He exclaimed, standing up, he crossed the few feet from me and enveloped me in his arms, he <em>felt<em> here, I smiled and gladly hugged him to me.  
>"How? How are you here?" I asked him, pulling back only slightly.<br>"I'm not, you're daydreaming, I'm asleep." Adrian explained to me, _I didn't know he could do that_, as if he read my thoughts, he added, "I've just learned."  
>"Wait... I'm daydreaming? So, I'm awake... but talking to myself or something?"<br>Adrian let out a low chuckle, tucking a loose strand of hair behind my ear, "No, you're continuing on as if nothing is happening, this is in your mind, just like when I dream walk while you're asleep."  
>We walked around the perimeter for another 5 minutes before I spoke again, "When can you come here? I miss you"<br>"Okay," Adrian relented, "I'll come as soon as I can, I'll talk to Tatiana when I wake up." I exhaled in a rush.  
>"Thank you!" I swung myself around so that I was hugging him tightly again, I planted a kiss on his neck before releasing him.<br>"I love you, Rose." Adrian whispered, holding my hand as we walked.  
>"I love you, too" I murmured back, squeezing his hand slightly, all the while keeping an eye out for anything suspicious.<br>"I should let you get back to your guardian work." He finally said, I nodded slowly, not willing to let him leave yet.  
>"I'll see you soon then?" I asked, hopefully.<br>"Probably, I'll tell you when I can make it, maybe tomorrow, or the next." he explained, I sighed and gave him a kiss on the cheek – something that he quickly turned into a make out session. _I'll never get tired of this. _I thought to myself, my love for Adrian was very different to my love for Dimitri – with Adrian it was emotional, whereas with Dimitri it was more physical although we never really did anything, it was always about _wanting_ to, our connection was electric and uncontrollable – something that I would now have to _try _to control with Adrian in the picture.

When I was awoken from my day dream, I quickly finished off my rounds, making sure to keep an extra eye out now that I was alone and went back to the house – happier than before.  
>I noted through the bond that Lissa saw the change in my mood but she was going to question me about it later.<br>I stood in the entryway of the room, in perfect view of the window and front door, I wasn't usually this uptight with my guardian work – there was never any reason for it, always being at the Royal Court, but now there was real danger that could arise at any moment, we didn't know if the Strigoi that Dimitri had killed was part of a clan, his partners could be looking for us now.  
>"Relax a little, Rose," Tasha murmured as she walked past me and over to where Lissa and Christian were sitting, they looked up when she spoke.<br>I stiffly shook my head and shot another glance towards the window and door – completely forgetting the looking-without-really-looking strategy most guardians did.  
>"They can't get passed the wards, so don't fret," She murmured, sitting down next to Christian and stealing one of his chips.<br>"It's my job" I reminded her, deciding to look into space – keeping everything in my peripheral vision.

"Hey baby" I jumped slightly, Adrian standing in the doorway to the bedroom I was staying in.  
>"Am I day dreaming again?" I asked sceptically, I didn't want to get worked up if he was just dream walking.<br>"Nope, I'm really here." Adrian told me, smiling his lazy grin, I made a sound of excitement and jumped off the bed, wrapping my arms around his neck.  
>"How did you get here so fast?" I murmured.<br>"I _told_ Tatiana that I was leaving rather than asked her." He said simply.  
>"You're here!" I whispered, nuzzling into him. Adrian managed to pick me up – somewhat easy for a Moroi and kick the door closed as he carried me to the bed, we laid together just cuddling until I started getting really giddy that he was finally here – although it'd only been 2 days since I'd last seen him, it had felt like an eternity. I locked our lips together, pulling myself closer to him with every kiss that we exchanged. I'd just pulled away from him to breathe when there was a knock on the door. Adrian chose to ignore it, moving his lips to my neck to trail kisses back and forth to my collarbone, I didn't want to interrupt him so I ignored the knock as well.<br>I lightly ground my teeth together when whoever was at the door, knocked again. "Go away" Adrian said loudly, his breath tickling my skin.  
>"Tasha's made dinner, she sent me to fetch you." Dimitri's voice sounded, I froze for a few seconds before I felt Adrian moving from me, I quickly pulled him back.<br>"Okay" I told Dimitri though I made no motion to move, enjoying the feel of Adrian's weight on me, I broke our kiss early when I heard the door actually open. "What?" I growled, annoyed.  
>"Oh, sorry, I thought you meant for me to come inside" he stammered, and quickly shut the door again.<br>"I guess we should go down before he comes back" Adrian murmured, I gave him my agreement and let him get up this time.

"Thanks for finally joining us" Lissa announced once we'd gotten to the dining room, giving us a sly grin.  
>"Sorry, Adrian was settling in," I apologised, although it was a lie and this time I was caught out.<br>"Yeah, we can see that." Christian murmured, gesturing to something behind me, I followed his gaze and saw Adrian's suitcase still beside the stairs.  
>"Oh..." I trailed off, feeling awkward. I cleared my throat and turned my attention to the food that had been set in front of me, "This tastes great, Tasha." I finally said.<p>

"I'm so glad you're here" I murmured to Adrian once we'd finished dinner and gone back to the room, I snuggled closer to him.  
>"I'm happy I came, too" he whispered close to my ear, I sighed contently and closed my eyes, feeling his lips against my ear and travelling along my jawline. I anticipated his lips against mine and smiled into the kiss when he finally reached them.<br>Adrian peppered me with sweet kisses until, of course, he started deepening them, becoming more urgent and seductive. I let him lead, glad to have him here with me and lost all train of coherent thought as we got further and further into our need for each other.

[Author Note: I know this is a short chapter but I just needed to update something, I'm sorry if I got anything wrong in this chapter, I'm not not 100% on Adrian and Rose's relationship in the later books, so yeah. But this is how I wanted it to be, I wanted to show everyone how much Rose cares about Adrian and stuff, rather than just her feelings for Dimitri which she's still confused about. REVIEW]


	5. Remember When

_Chapter Four : Remember When._

I'm not lost.

I'm not gone.

I haven't forgot.

These feelings I can't shake no more.

These feelings are running out the door.

I can feel it falling down.

And I'm not coming back around.

These feelings I can't take no more.

This emptiness in the bottom drawer.

It's getting harder to pretend.

And I'm not coming back around again.

Remember when...

I remember when.  
>It was together 'til the end.<br>Now I'm alone again.  
>Where do I begin?<br>I cried a little bit.  
>You died a little bit.<br>Please say there's no regrets.  
>And say you won't forget.<p>

These feelings I can't shake no more.

These feelings are running out the door.

I can feel it falling down.

And I'm not coming back around.

These feelings I can't take no more.

This emptiness in the bottom drawer.

It's getting harder to pretend.

And I'm not coming back around again.

Remember when...

That was then.

Now it's the end.

I'm not coming back.

I can't pretend.

Remember when.

-.- -.- -.- -.- -.- -.-

I thought that having Adrian here would be good and help me focus on why _I_ was really here – to be Lissa's guardian, not to get wrapped up in Dimitri. But often, I found myself wishing that he was only dream walking, hoping that I'd wake up and be by myself, free to feel how I wanted, without having the constant reminder that whatever I was feeling towards Dimitri was wrong and hurtful to others.

"Morning, little dhampir" I heard Adrian's voice close to my ear, I rolled over, yawning although I'd been awake for almost 15 minutes, snuggling closer to him.

"Good morning" I smiled, I sighed quietly and sat up, getting out of bed. "We have a lot to do today"

I quickly got out a pair of black leggings with a half sleeved grey top, and a pair of grey lace up shoes to wear, and made my way to the bathroom to have a shower, tying my hair up so it didn't get wet -I'd washed it the day before [on profile].  
>I only had time to put a towel around myself when there was a knock on the door, "Rose?" I heard Lissa's voice ask.<br>"One second, Liss." I called, putting my clothes on as fast as I could. I glanced at Adrian, seated on the bed, in a green and light blue striped button-down shirt, with black jeans and black shoes, I saw a ring on his right hand and knew it was his family crest [on profile]. I shot him a smile as I opened the door, turning my grin to Lissa.  
>"Hi" I greeted her, moving aside for her to enter.<br>"Good morning" She said to both of us. "I wanted to ask you something, Rose" Lissa started.  
>"I'll leave you girls alone, I'm going to go outside for a smoke." Adrian told us, getting up, I pouted – hating the fact that he still smoked, but I guessed it was better than him smoking <em>and <em>drinking, and he _was _cutting down.  
>"Okay" I murmured, kissing him back when he pecked me on the lips before leaving the room.<br>"So what did you want to ask me?" I asked Lissa, sitting on my bed, she followed suit.  
>"Well, It's Tasha's birthday in a few days, so I was going to ask if you wanted to come shopping with me today?"<br>"I'm your Guardian, Liss, I'd be going with you anyway. You don't have to ask anymore." I told her.  
>"I don't like bossing you around, it's weird. So, do you want to?" I laughed a little and nodded my head.<br>"Is Christian coming?"  
>"No, I sort of just wanted it to be us, If that's alright with you" I nodded again, smiling, it had seemed like years since Lissa and I had spent any real time alone.<br>"When do you want to leave?" I asked.  
>"After breakfast?"<br>"Sure" I mumbled, getting up and leading the way out of my room and down the stairs.

"Good morning, girls" Tasha smiled as we entered the room. We both mumbled a _good morning _back to her, and sat down to breakfast.  
>"Tasha, Rose and I were hoping to go shopping this morning, I hope that's okay." Lissa said after everyone had gotten their food.<br>"Of course, Dimitri will go with you, right Dimka?" Tasha said, smiling at her Guardian, both Lissa and I froze a little bit.  
>"Oh, well we were actually wanting to go by ourselves, I'm more than capable of protecting her for a few hours. I am her Guardian after all." I directed to Tasha, trying to be as polite as possible.<br>"I'm sure you are, Rose. But Lissa is Royalty, she must have 2 Guardian's with her at all times." She dismissed.  
>I bit my lip and looked at Lissa, she just shrugged her shoulder and continued eating, so I let it drop.<p>

"Get something off the rack and pretend to be trying it on, I need to talk to you." I looked back at Dimitri and Adrian – I hadn't been able to say no to him when he'd asked if he could tag along, now that Dimitri was here we couldn't use the excuse that we wanted to have some alone time. Thankfully, Christian had told Lissa that he and Eddie would stay with Tasha so she wasn't left alone. I could feel the tension with Adrian and Dimitri, and was happy for an excuse to be away from them for at least a minute, even though I was a bit hesitant to leave them together.  
>I grabbed a random top from the closest clothes rack and pretended to look at it for a second before motioning to the two boys that we were going to go try them on.<br>"What is it?" I asked once we'd gotten into our separate changing booths, right next to each other.  
>"Why didn't you tell me?" She whispered.<br>"What?" I asked, slightly louder than her.  
>"Why didn't you tell me that you still loved him?" I froze, letting the silence stretch for a few seconds.<br>"Love who?" I asked hesitantly.  
>"Dimitri,"<br>"I don't" I mumbled, somewhat pathetically.  
>"Don't lie to me," I heard her stall door open, and unlocked my one a few microseconds later, letting her come inside. I sat on the small bench behind me and looked at the floor.<br>"How did you know?" I asked, not bothering to keep up my facade.  
>"It's obvious," She just shrugged, "I'm surprised no-one else has noticed yet."<br>I stayed quiet, playing with the hem of my top, a few seconds later I looked up, giving her a weak smile.  
>"Has anything happened between you two? Since we've been here?" She asked, seeming as if she was afraid of the answer.<br>I nodded silently.  
>"Like what?"<br>"Um, we've spoken, we've fought... kissed." I finished, I saw Lissa sigh and shake her head – I think she might have been anticipating my answer.  
>"You can't do this, Rose. What about Adrian? Don't you think he deserves your undivided attention?" I nodded my head.<br>"I don't want to talk about this, yet. Adrian doesn't know, I'd like to keep it that way."  
>I got up and opened the door to our changing booth, and saw Adrian standing in front of me, <em>oh no.<br>_"Adrian" was all I had time I say before he spun around and stalked off, out of the store. I turned to Lissa, her shocked expression mirrored mine, I looked back to where he'd disappeared, all of my guilt dawning on me.  
>I took off at an almost full sprint after him, only getting to the entrance of the mall before I stopped, I could have tracked him, finding him eventually, but I knew that if he'd gone this far, there's no way he'd want to see me yet. I'd meet him back at Tasha's and explain everything to him there.<br>I slugged back to the shop that Dimitri and Lissa were still in and stood against the wall, my thoughts far away. I only came out of it when they approached me.  
>"Did you find him?" Lissa asked softly, already knowing the answer, I shook my head anyway.<br>"Why did Adrian leave?" Dimitri asked, I kept quiet though, leading them away from the shop, I kept an eye out for any danger – and walked into another clothing store, Lissa still hadn't found anything for Tasha yet.

I did my best to bottle the emotions I was feeling about Adrian, focusing on Lissa and why we were here.  
>Lissa and Dimitri, seeing the change in me, kept quiet and only spoke when it was necessary, eventually, we got home at about noon, having bought Tasha a black coat.<p>

"Where's Adrian?" Tasha asked, looking around us.  
>"He's not back?" I responded.<br>"No, didn't he go to the mall with you?"  
>"He got mad at me and left. Are you sure he didn't come back?"<br>"Yes" She said slowly.  
>"Don't worry, Rose, he'll come back when he's ready. He knows how to take care of himself." Lissa tried to console me, but I shrugged her hand from my shoulder and walked to my bedroom, flopping down on my bed.<p>

I was sitting in my room for about 15 minutes before there was a knock on the door.  
>"Come in" I called, and Lissa entered.<br>"Are you okay?" She asked, sitting on the edge of my bed.  
>I shrugged, "I feel so guilty."<br>"You couldn't have known that he was listening," She told me softly, I sighed and looked down at my hands.  
>"He's done nothing wrong to me the whole time I've known him, and then I go and do this." I shook my head at myself.<br>"He loves you, Rose. You'll get past this."  
>"I don't think so, I wouldn't want to if I was him, knowing that he was in love with someone else..." I trailed off, crossing my arms across my chest and leaning back against the headboard.<p>

I froze when there was another knock on the door, tensing, thinking it was Adrian.  
>"Come in" I said, I slumped when I saw that it was only Christian.<br>"What happened?" He asked as soon as he'd closed the door.  
>"Adrian's angry with me," I told him.<br>"Why? You two never fight." he said, sitting down next to Lissa.  
>"Remember when Lissa told you about my crush on Dimitri? Back at school?" I started, when he nodded, I continued, "Well, it's a little more than a crush... and I'm still not over it, and well, and when we were shopping, Adrian overheard me telling Lissa."<br>"How much more...?" Christian asked cautiously then, looking between Lissa and I.  
>"I'm in love with him." I clarified.<br>"And Adrian heard you tell Lissa that?" I nodded, but then shrugged.  
>"I'm not entirely sure what he heard, I don't think he was there when Lissa came into my stall, because we would have seen him." But then sighed, getting up from the bed.<br>"Where are you going?" Lissa asked.  
>"I need to make my rounds."<br>"Why don't you ask Eddie to do it?" Christian offered softly.  
>I quickly shook my head, "He did the last one, I want some fresh air anyway."<p>

It took me 30 minutes to search the perimeter of the house, I took my time, liking the wind on my face, letting it clear my mind.  
>"It's clear" I muttered as I walked past Dimitri, and said the same thing to Eddie when I passed him.<p>

I didn't eat much dinner that night, too anxious as to why Adrian _still _hadn't come back yet.  
>"What if he's hurt?" I announced, breaking the silence.<br>"I've known Adrian Ivashkov for a while now, he knows how to take care of himself, Rose. He'll turn up when he's had time to think." I tried to let what Tasha had said calm me, I pulled my emotions in, there was a bigger picture to be seen. I'm Lissa's Guardian, her safety comes first, before everything else.  
>I sighed and scanned the room, though I knew there wouldn't be any danger here, not with the protective charms around the house.<p>

-.- -.- -.-

It turned out that Adrian came back some time during the night while I was asleep, he didn't come to our room – but instead was sleeping on the sofa when I went down for breakfast.  
>I sighed and crouched down near his head, I was immediately met with the odour of Alcohol and Cigarette smoke. "Adrian" I called softly.<br>He mumbled something intelligible and put his arm over his eyes.  
>Usually, I would have smiled and kissed the part of his face that I could see, but under these circumstances, I just reached out and removed his arm, calling out to him again.<br>"Go away, Rose." he muttered, it hurt me a bit but I knew that I deserved it.  
>"Please wake up" I whispered softly, close to his ear.<br>"I am awake, but I don't want to talk to you, go away." he croaked, his voice strong with the effects of drinking too much alcohol. I sighed and got up, walking away.

"Get up, you're not going to sleep all day" Tasha demanded of Adrian, I heard some grumbling and more words from Tasha before Adrian stomped up the stairs and out of sight.  
>"He's going to go have a shower," she told me, smiling softly. I stayed quiet, picking at my cereal with my spoon.<br>"I'll take first scout." I told the other two Guardians, wanting to get out of the house already. I put my bowl in the dishwasher and quickly ran upstairs to brush my teeth – Adrian nowhere in sight.

"Look who it is," I heard come from a corner of the garden outside of Tasha's house.  
>"Adrian, what are you doing?" I asked, walking over to where he was, sitting on a garden chair with one of his cigarettes in his hands. <em>I thought he was having a shower<em>.  
>"Having a smoke" He mumbled, showing me the stick.<p>

"Adrian" I said softly, after a few moments of awkward silence.  
>"Sorry, little dhampir, I'm going inside to eat." I sighed and turned around, watching him walk off. <em>What was I supposed to do now? <em>

**[Author Note: Okay, I hope you liked this chapter, there'll be more of Rose and Adrian in the next chapter, BTW VOTE ON MY NEW POLL. :) xoxoxo]**


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